Saturday, March 29, 2008

Two Rooms Of My Own?

Is is possible?
Am I dreaming?
Until now I have had only one place to sit in the house (not counting the bed) and I feel overwhelmed with the abundance of places to sit now that the kitchen, Flying Squirrel World and MY STUDIO are finished.
Yes, I now have an official studio!!! The room we didn't know what to do with. The room where we walk in from the outdoors (for now). The room with the strange windows and the newly sanded and stained ancient wood floor.
Mine Mine Mine!!!
Now the pressure is on to get my stuff in there, organized and start creating! I am feeling a bit of performance anxiety! But I am thrilled to be able to have a place to put all my art supplies. They have been in bins in the basement, and I occaisionally go down and look around and see what I have and bring one or two things upstairs so I can collage, or paint in the den.
I have always wanted a room with lots of space and light and shelves to hold my stuff. A collage artist has lots of stuff....never know when you will need that bit of stuff over there....oooh, isn't that an interesting scrap, might use that someday. Oh, and did I mention the magazines? I am always cutting up magazines so I need a place to put them.
I got the curtains up today, unpacked a couple of plastic bins, hung one picture.
A Studio AND the Flying Squirrel World Observation Deck, all in my sweet little cottage in the woods. Some one pinch me, I must be dreaming.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Quick Catch Up

Greetings! Today we had the most beautiful day of snow ever! It came down consistently for hours and hours. Large drifting flakes that looked like flower petals drifting to the ground. There was some wind (we are on a Great Lake...can't be helped) and at the end of the day the petals came down and the sun came out! It was beautiful!
Today was my second whole day at work and I did well. I am sore, and I am tired, but I am happy and getting healthier. I follow up with the docs next week, hoping all is well with my intestines; I am following their instructions and I am feeling much better.

This is Murphy earlier this winter, down by the Lake. We like to go down there after the park has closed to campers and I let him run like the wild forest creature that he really is.
He looks so serious in these pictures because I kept interupting his romp so I could take pictures, or I was holding a stick so I could get his attention.
Not alot of news and time for me to go to bed.
Till later.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Observation Deck

Observation Deck
Originally uploaded by Gertibird

Changes in the Flying Squirrel World Observation Deck! Hubby moved the chairs in yesterday so I can enjoy the view while I am home sick.
Having some complications with my recovery. Saw my docs and talked to them again today. Patience...not always my best virtue, but I am working on it. Changed my medicine and made some dietary changes. I know I will be fine, but I am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
Flying Squirrel World is an oasis for me.
Hubby also informed me that he wants me to have the front room as my studio. A room of my own!!! A beautiful, sunny room to create! It is my dream!
The contractors are still painting ceilings and finishing molding but we are almost done!

Monday, March 17, 2008

Flickr Pro...yeah that's me!

I did it. I paid for a Flickr Pro account. This is what happens when you have a convolescing woman, a credit card and too many hours on the internet. I am uploading lots and lots of pics and organizing and tagging and having a good old
Sunset over Frozen Lake Ontario - I swear these are the real colors.

I have been a photographer for most of my life. The first gift I can remember from my grandmother was a kodak fixed lens, drop in film, camera. I loved it and used it for years and years. The first thing I ever saved up a significant amount of money to buy, on my own, was a Canon A-1 that I had for almost 20 years when it gave up the ghost.

I was 11 and kept all my babysitting money in a box. Mom bought me magazines so I could read up on cameras and research which one would be the best for what I wanted. (thus began a life long love of research). When I knew what I wanted and why, she pitched in half the money. I still remember that day when we went to the store. I had never owned anything so expensive and I paid for half!!! Of course I forgot to count in the cost of film, developing, prints, etc. I was not in a metropolis, so places that did contact sheets were few and far between. I learned alot, I earned my money babysitting and I got some good shots with that old camera.
I do like the ability to take more pictures for less money with digital cameras. Not having to print everything to see what you go, not having to WAIT for printing! That is the best.

My most recent camera is a Fuji, digital, FAST and FABULOUS! I never thought I would convert to all digital until this camera came into my life. I could not stand lag time, even when just shooting snapshots of family....even when shooting portraits! I went insane waiting for the camera to cycle to the next shot. The fuji is fast, takes great natural light shots, has a very good zoom and is pretty consistently in focus using autofocus, pretty quickly and shooting on the fly.
Usually, I take ALOT of pictures. I carry my camera in my big shoulder bag and have it with me on whatever adventure I end up on during the day. I try to capture pictures of birds and squirrels in Flying Squirrel World too.

My next project is to scan (some), organize and store, the boxes and boxes of old photos from my childhood and from my family archives. (In addition to scanning some of my collage pieces) I have one more week home....we shall see how productive I choose to be.
I am currently also collaging ideas for the kitchen desk/project/studio area that I am putting together. It is like making a visual desire list; lots of desk surface area, lots of light, lots of storage, lots of comfy places to sit.
"all I want is a room somewhere, far away from the cold night air, and one enormous chair, oh wouldn't it be loverly"

this folding table and chair was my first foray into putting a stake into the ground and creating a place for me to write, collage, think, etc.

Hubby got me a great desk for Christmas. We are now in the final stages of renovation in this part of the house and I am hoping to be working on and in my space again SOON!!!

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Been getting out and about the past three days. One outing each day followed by a nice nap. I have always loved naps - so decadent.
I am grateful today for my beloved friends, old and new, who have checked in with me, held me in their healing hearts, prayed for me, sent cards, called, reminded me to go slow and take care of myself, sent me books, made me laugh, and filled me with love and gratitude.
My first outing was Thursday. I wanted to go into the village for a parade. Our highschool girls and boys basketball teams are in the state finals and my mayor put together a quick rah-rah-sis-boom-bah parade for them. It was GREAT! My former mayor walked me around, let me hold his arm so I wouldn't slip on the ice, made sure I didn't get too tired and didn't make fun of me because I was so thrilled to be out in the world again and so grateful for his generous spirit. He walked me around, showed me his house, drove me to get my pay check and drove me home. I told his dear wife I was going to adopt him. She was fine with that. tee hee...

The parade and the day were classic village life. I knew people on the street and they knew me and were glad to see me up and about. The snow started swooping in off the harbor and hoodies and hats and scarves went on and we kept cheering as the school paraded down to the front lawn of the visitor's center. Then when the teams finally got there, the mayor called each player, individually, and the whole village cheered them on. It was great.

I am grateful for Murphy the Healer.
When our first baby, Teddy, died I didn't know how we would survive the grief. We both believe that Teddy's spirit lead us to find Murphy that same day. And with the love and laughter of a new baby, we were able to survive the pain and sorrow of losing our first love.
Murphy has been glued to my side throughout my recovery. When Mommy naps, he naps. When Mommy sits on the couch, Murphy sits on the couch. When Mommy eats some toast, Murphy east some toast (somethings don't really change).
I have a special medication that has helped me get up and move after surgery. It is an anti-inflamatory suppository (TMI?) that I have to take twice a day. Daddy helps on the business end of things and Murphy sits and lets me scratch his back, or rub his ears, and watches over the procedure.
Today, Dr. M stayed sitting by me after the medicine was administered, and he turned and leaned his back against my pelvis. He stayed in that position for more than five minutes. There were times he didn't even look too comfortable, but still he stayed there, leaning against the place that hurt the most. The warmth of his body and the gentle pressure felt like the embodiment of the golden healing light I have been visualizing in the place where my ovary was. This is the spot that hurts the most and it as like Murphy wanted to be my warm golden light.
I am grateful for my recovery. It has been speedy, uncomplicated and the pain has been managed quite well. Ladies if a hysterectomy is in your plans, ask your doctors about a suppository form of diclofenac (voltaren) - it has been a lifesaver.
I am grateful for Spring coming around the corner and my health and looking forward to many new adventures this year.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Until I Truly Loved

Until I Truly Loved
Originally uploaded by Gertibird
February 2006 - my beloved german shephard - Teddy - was dying from pancreatic cancer. Hubby and I moved downstairs into the den and set up a hospital unit for him.
I did alot of collage work at that time, though we had to take down my work table to make room for the 5 foot tall by 5 foot wide crate that we set up for his recovery from surgery.
Hubby and I slept on the couch alot so Teddy wouldn't have to climb stairs to our bedroom.

Today - March 2008 - While I am recovering from my surgery I have been wishing I felt better and could better use my time to be creative. So while looking for small ways to be creative I decided to scan a few of the collages I made in the past. I got the scanner, copier for my birthday and have not really used it much. I am hopeful I will have more energy for my creative pursuits soon, and in the future, I expect to have more energy now that Pomelos are not sucking the life out of me!

Saturday, March 8, 2008

Feel My Melons

OK, I am back from the hospital.
Pain is managable. Taking care of myself, lots of rest, fresh fruit, regular meals, more rest. I am tired and I guess I am cranky according to my husband, but I also don't care. He has had more separation anxiety than my dog, who has been at my side non-stop since I returned.

I had my uterus removed.
I lost alot of blood and was given two units.
I had alot of scar tissue and the doctors said I had two tumors the size of pomelos.
Is that the medically correct terminology?
This is a pic I got off the net and I send my thanks to my anonymous friend for letting me use his picture to illustrate the size of my fibroids.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Surgical Prep

I worked in a hospital for many years. I worked with surgical patients and care givers for many years. I hate surgery.
On Wednesday I am having a hysterectomy that I have put off for a long time, hoping I would make it to menopause and those rotten fibroids would shrink. I could not wait that long. I have had too much pain, too much anemia, too many days feeling like crap each fact there are months that I have one good week, and that is it. It is almost like I have forgotten how to feel good.
I am a week into the last period I will ever have and I have felt terrible for the better part of the past two weeks. The week before is never good. The week (or
two) of bleeding is bad, and sometimes there is a week after that is painful. That makes four bad weeks...not every month, but often enough, that it is time to improve my life through surgery.
have been talking to friends. I have been getting great advice.
I have been getting ideas on how to bring pleasure into this event.
One of my favorite ideas was to get a new box or crayons and/or colored pencils and a cool coloring book. I am a creative soul, but I have also had major surgery before and know that mental and physical energy can be low. I loved this idea because it was a way for me to enjoy something creative without requiring much mental or physical energy. She suggested a book of celtic designs. I am going to Michael's Arts and Crafts tomorrow to see what I can find. I already got a great deal on those twist up color pencils.
I bought a stuffed lion. He converts from a pillow with a lion head on it, to a huggable lion with the help of two strips of velcro. He is soft and Murphy colored and I thought it would be nice to have him with me in the hospital since I can't bring Murphy. (How uncivilized.)
I have some clean crisp cotton sheets I will ask Hubby to put on the bed for me before I come home. I have a list of juices, jellos, and foods I would like to have in the house. I am preparing the room and especially the bedside table to hold my magazines, laptop, art supplies, phone, drink. Oh and of the glor
ious women in my life reminded me of the healing properties of we will have some delicious morsels available.
Tomorrow I will post the poem - chant - cheer that my friend wrote when she and her sister in law went through their hysterectomies. It made me laugh and smile and not feel so scared and alone.